6 Things to Consider Before You POP the Question

So the stars have aligned and you've set your mind to propose to your sweetheart, you want to plan the most perfect proposal, and why wouldn't you want to give the love of your life the absolute best?! After having photographed a handful of proposals over the last 4 years, and living through my own proposal, I've written out 6 things to keep in mind when planning your proposal below.

1. location

I always recommend couples choose a location that means something to them when choosing a location for their engagement photos, and of course this also applies (probably even more so!) for a proposal. Whether it is your first date spot, your partner's favorite park/neighborhood, or your favorite or most memorable date night spot, I always recommend choosing something meaningful to you and your partner over something popular/trendy. Personally, I also appreciate proposals at landmarks that are most likely to still be around in years to come. There's something special about visiting your proposal location and re-living through the memories and feelings of that oh so special fleeting moment.

2. time of day

For the most part, outdoor portrait photographers will most likely suggest sunrise and sunset as the most preferred times for any photo session. As you prepare to POP! the question to your significant other, time of day is one of those important things you want to consider:

A proposal at sunrise can make for some very soft, dream-like lightning for your photos, and can turn out to be a more intimate moment just between the two of you, as there's a good chance not many people will be around at such an early hour. If you are set on proposing at a very specific location and you have a more intricate set-up in mind, sunrise is your best bet to ensure the spot you've set your eyes and heart on is available for you to get down on your knee. A proposal at sunrise would be ideal for couples who want to have a proposal at a public landmark, or well-known location but want to avoid the crowds and many other 'distractions' that you can encounter while proposing around larger crowds. If you ARE considering a sunrise proposal, also take into consideration the fact that you will most likely want your partner to 'look nice' for the occasion - the last thing your partner probably wants is to be proposed to while groggy, in sweatpants, and bed-hair, so if your partner and/or you are not early risers or 'morning people', I would give a sunrise proposal a second thought...

A sunset light is golden, dramatic, and can create beautiful images with vibrant colors. A proposal at sunset allows you and your partner ample time to dress up 'for the occasion' *wink wink* and you can most easily sneak in a 'romantic date night' as your excuse for dressing up. If family and/or friends will play a role in the proposal, or you simply want them to witness the moment, the late afternoon/early evening is a great time to coordinate with everyone you want present. However, a sunset proposal will most likely mean more people, more 'distractions' and naturally, a more 'public' proposal. Another factor to consider is, if you're running behind on plans, nighttime may creep up on you (and your photographer!) which could mean missing out on the 'magic hour' golden light altogether. Having said that, if you tend to run behind on plans, and you or your partner don't feel as comfortable with many onlookers cheering and "awwwing", perhaps re-consider a sunset proposal.

3. basic questions for your photographer

Most guys (or gals) who plan a proposal leave the photographer for the very last minute, and, to be honest, it's completely understandable - you've been juggling a lot of things, all while keeping it a secret from your best friend... that is no simple task! Eventually, you will most likely contact a photographer to capture the moment you've been intricately planning and preparing for. Here are some questions you should ask your photographer:

• "Are you familiar with the location? If not, do you plan on going before the proposal to explore? Would you like to meet up and go together?" - the last thing you want is to hire someone who will be lost, attempting to contact you while you're about to ask the biggest question of your life. Or worse, have them believe they're at the right location, and they end up missing the proposal altogether (yikes!)

• "Where will we meet?" Sometimes, I've met with friends/family members who have been in charge of setting up for the proposal, and the meeting place and time has been pre-determined. Other times, when the proposal has only involved the couple, I've communicated with the partner proposing well in advance, to come up with a plan which involves me letting him/her know where I will be (most likely hidden in a bush somewhere, haha) and confirm where the asking partner plans on going down on one knee to ensure we are both on the same page, and allow me to best capture the moment.

• "Where should we be, how should we stand?" This is a question that asking partners either never think to ask, or they overthink it. Of course you'd want the location you've chosen to be reflected through the photos documenting your precious moment. Your photographer should give you a couple of pieces of advice regarding things to keep in mind for the moment, and they should guide you on where to be to ensure capturing as much of the location as possible. However, the most important thing I tell those who have hired me for documenting their proposal is to "just do you, enjoy YOUR moment, ignore me." Not often, but sometimes, the asking partner will be looking around trying to see where the camera is, as he/she is walking up to the proposal spot, or shortly after popping the question. It's important to keep in mind this is your moment, and it's fleeting so make the most of it, and soak it up yourself - your photographer will do their job and capture the moment for you to look back on.

Finally, make sure to communicate expectations with your photographer. Whether you want to just document the moment, or you want your photographer to capture moments leading up to the question (think: scavenger hunt style proposal) and whether or not you and your soon to be fiancée will want to take additional formal portraits post proposal. You want to make sure you and your photographer are on the same page in terms of the plan(s) in place, and make sure you consider the timing for these into your overall plan as well.

4. appearance matters, and don't forget about yourself!

Make sure to communicate to your partner about how to dress, discreetly guide their outfit selection to go along with the results you have envisioned - think: a hiking mountaintop proposal vs a dressed up proposal in the city. You know your partner and your relationship best, so make sure their outward appearance goes along with what they would like to look back on in photos and videos - and, one very important point: don't forget about yourself! Make sure your appearance matches your partners - don't wear shorts if she's wearing a floor length formal dress.

5. take your time

I always tell the asking partners to take their time - the moment is unforgettable but it really is fleeting (talk about the importance of documenting it!) For the 5 minutes the partner feels they're taking up, most likely barely a minute has gone by. Enjoy the moment, soak it up, this is YOUR moment, and it won't ever come back, take. your. time.

6. Go with the flow - laughter is your best friend!

Regardless of however many countless hours you've spent planning for your proposal to the love of your life, keep in mind some things may not align come day-of. There are things outside of your control (weather, traffic, public events) that could interfere with what you originally had in mind. Keep a positive mindset, and go with the flow - after all, you are with your best friend, and what matters at the end of the day is you love each other and want to continue this journey of life with them by your side.

Thanks for reading! I hope these points have been helpful as you plan your most perfect, lovely proposal, and congratulations in advance 😉